Monday, March 31

April....fooled??

April 1st, 2008; 1200 hr.

He sent me 'happiness',
But I wasn't gonna fall for it,
Coz I know he was fooling around,
On this 'so-called-delightful' day.

I knew it was joke,
And I went with the flow,
But I knew I couldn't fool myself,
For such words he threw.

He knew that I've known,
For the words that I splurged,
However straight life may seem,
Bended ribbons it is now turning to be.



April 1st, 2008; 1429hr.


Life is fine and gracious,
Yet sometimes it can be horror,
Though it isn't always a torture,
But it always leave me hollow.

Go heart go,
Fly away to kingdoms afar,
Leave me with only a mind to bare,
So you'll ever again be in agony.

Go heart go,
Soar to a place you desire,
I'll find you when I need you,
When life is kinder and warmer.

Go heart go,
Spread your wings and roam in the zephyr,
Leave me to face this immolation,
For only Him could return you back to me.


I'm a fool.

Good bye.
















Sunday, March 30

Him ^Part 3^

His smile makes me wonder,
Is there anything better,
Than this serenity that ponder,
Which my heart is after?

Smile for me.

Saturday, March 22

My Goals~

I feel like writing about my own personal self this time. Very personal. Huuuu...
Well, I've been thinking about my wishlist/goals that I would love to achieve it some day. InsyaAllah.. So here are some of the aims that I have thought of: ----->





#1: To finish my degree with at least 3.5 CGPA or better.

#2: To try for Masters abroad.

#3: To find a decent green job, and be a workaholic.

#4: To save lotsa cash to buy a small apartment, a small green-rated car and a new laptop.

#5: Support my brother with his studies.

#6: Undergo a Lasik surgery.


#7: To perform Haj with my family.


#8: To get married by 28.


#9: If I dont get married by 30, I'll be a spinster for life and will adopt an orphan.


#10: Backpack around the world with my adopted daughter, and have a blast!





These are some of the short term and long term goals. But we can only plan, and God to decide.



InsyaAllah..


Heeeee... peace!



Thursday, March 20

Dream..

Last night, me and a good friend of mine talked about my dad. Basically, this topic came up out of no where, and both of us were out of words at the and of it. Then I went to bed, only knowing that I couldn't fall asleep until it was around 0400 hr. And I dreamt. Of him.





I was driving a car, in a heavy road, heading to a place. Driving steadily, my dad was beside me, smiling. Outside, there was this political riot going on, with people fighting and the police trying their major best to comb things out. However, inside the car, there was like some kind of protective layer surrounding both of us, which left me out of any single worries of the rave outside. We turned into a silent road, to a place I think was home.

I made a quick lunch for both of us, and served at the dinner table. As we sat down facing the window, I saw him looking at me, without even touching his food. But his gaze was so soft, fuzzy and warm, as if to say that he loves me unconditionally, and is very proud to have a girl so brave. As if I knew what he was saying, I abruptly went to his seat and hugged him from behind. I couldn't touch him, but there was this scent, that was soooooooo heavenly, that it didn't matter if I wake up from this dream or not. It just didn't matter. I was home.

Then there was this valley, both of us were walking silently, with warm, loving thoughts crosses our minds, as he lead me to this ray of light. He was leaving me.. His face was full of light, and a sweet smile, as if to tell me its time for him to go. I was crying, half expected him to bring me along, and the other half to just let him go. As I wept silently, he walked into this light.... and I woke up.





I woke up to find that my pillow was drenched with tears and I was still crying. A peek at the time telling me that it was 0930 hr. So, many tears still falling from my eyes, and with a handful of hopes and prayers, I said to God to let me see him again. And I fell asleep.





I could see him from far, that he was standing there, waiting for me to walk to him. As I was walking, I could no longer feel the earth under my feet....it was as if I was floating. Suddenly, there was this voice screamed at my ear, saying "Muna, bangun la!". And the next thing I knew, I was cursing her under my breath.





I hate it. Saya tidak suka bangun secara terkejut. And I mean shock/abrupt/sudden/surprised. Not bangunkan. They are two different things. I hate it. I will never mind people waking me up slowly. I thank them for that. But not by screaming at my ears, or by shouting at my name, or suddenly slammed something. They shock me. (Faham x?)



I'm so gonna kick her arse.

Saturday, March 15

Him ^Part 2^

Hindrance is such agony,
Where ignorance aint that easy,
Betrayal is beyond sanity,
Loosing it, is out of the question, completely.

Help me.

Friday, March 14

Annual Dinner ::Finale::

Yesterday was the big event. The food were nice and generous, and it was Dr Juan's birthday too.

All the seniors had fun (as i saw them mingle around taking gazillion pictures), eventhough d room was quite dim, the laughter and cheers were definitely in the air. Everybody was everywhere! Photo maniacs!

But there were a few flaws that I would like to comment though. They shouldn't have done the senior's award to be repeated. I mean if a person was awarded with a title, then allow another for other awards. Yesterday Jimmy received 3 awards, and Ise got 2. Its just unfair to others who was also nominated. Be fair guys!

The king of the night went to a 2nd year junior (which i forgot his name), and the queen of the night went to Anis!! OMG!!!! Anis was so feminine last night, you just couldn't believe it was her! All this while she had this attitude and fierceness of a tomboy girl, but yesterday, she was absolutely turned over. Bravo kid, bravo!

But all in all, it was a great event. We enjoyed it. Many thanks especially to my 2nd year juniors and not to forget our 1st years too. Thanks guys.

To my peers, I hope u enjoyed taking lots of piccies yesterday and hold that in your memories as our path will be separated within the next 2 months. Though we will meet again by July for convocation, but there is a larger picture of future afterwards. With that, I wish Good Luck to each of you...


Visit my friendster for the photos

Thursday, March 13

Annual Dinner ::Part 2::

Decisions made.


I'm going to the event.


But I'm going alone.


Single.



Always dreamed of bringing an usher to my last dinner (during school times...).



But no opportunity this time, so deal with it la.



Maybe for Master's dinner kot.....


Hehe.. See lah if got rezeki. (Perasan~)


;p

Wednesday, March 12

Him ^Part 1^

The thought of him makes me happy,
To say his name makes me flutter,
Each word rhymes like a melody,
Where Spring is for ever.

Hear me...

Saturday, March 8

Annual Dinner ::Part 1::

Hurmmm......

Course Night 2008.

The annual dinner will be held at Primula Hotel, March 14th, 2008. The theme will be Ocean Symphony.


Semi-formal.


RM 40 per head.


Should I go?


Shouldn't I go?


Heard that Adam told Ajwee there will be no entertainment whatsoever.


Great.


It'll be pure dinner function. With no music.


....



If I'm going, I'm gonna wear jeans.

Thursday, March 6

Fool~

Everyday, you and me together,
Swore to love for ever,
Has always been a fighter,
Hearts and passion we master,
But eternal ain't what you're after.


Chorus

I've given my words with clearance,
But you never listen to each sentence,
Nor you ever let me into the silence,
Idyllic to you, festive in innocence,
you left me only with the heartburns,
I'm a fool.


Far destiny is such denial,
For what you did is such betrayal,
I'm buried down in the abyssal,
Could I get you back as my final?
After you've run a thousand mile.


Repeat chorus


Run away, it's useless now,
Hundreds of letters I vow,
Your dreams were foul,
I am dead and still,
I am a fool.


I wrote this during the last EIA class. Was bored, n my friend asked for another lyric. So I did it. hurmmm..... I dont know. U rate it.

Sunday, March 2

Election's campaigns in T'ganu

Living in Tganu has brought many changes in my life. Before, I have discovered Penang as my dear hometown, moved to KL for a while, and now we have settled down in Shah Alam. Studying in Tganu was out of my options in life, but since the only places that offer a degree in Marine Biology is both in Sabah and Tganu, i took UMT as my prior choice; due to the fact that this secluded place was established far longer than UMS. So, the marine studies should be better than the one in Sabah. But that was just an opinion.

Let's go back to where I'm supposed to start. Elections=Campaigns. As far as I'm concern, all the places that I've stayed, all ruled by the government. So, it was and still is quite unfamiliar to be under a state influenced by the opposition party. To say, this state still under the gov, but the aura of an opposition party is quite strong here. And that's just the beginning, literally..

I am a Muslim, and I love my religion and country. I have faith in God and in peace. But then again, living here in KT has really challenged my mindset towards their offensive mentality. Why? Let me summarize some things that will make you wonder~

A few years back, the gov ruled this small state and willingly donated RM200 to each locals which was studying in the IPTA, but when the opposition won the following election, they asked each student to return each sen back. Why? I have no idea. Maybe bcoz they dont want their youngsters to be bribed to further their studies.... then look back to all the mat and minah rempit doing their stuffs each night, without consideration of others.

Before the gov won the election again 4 years ago, the city looked very much the same as any undeveloped suburban places. Since they won, the gov has spent a lot of money on raising the state to be a developed state, both economically, and spiritually. A lot has been done to civilize and educate this state to a better future. Including the on-going project of replicas of world's well-known mosques. I'm very thrilled with this idea, due to the fact that we could actually see the wonders of these mosques, eventhough they are just replicas. I'm not financially wealthy, so replicas will do. Hehe.. But the opposition party is so raved about this project, that they are stating this idea was really a slack. (I'm not gonna write down what they say, bcoz it might be offensive to some people). They placed this big billboard at a junction a few months b4 the campaign, but now the pictures have been torn and there were harsh words written on it. How can they, the same people who vows to the crowd about religion, can actually do this?? Think about it.

On roadsides, they placed a lot of banners to criticize each other. Mockery, hatred, revenge, verbal molestation are all over the place! They are doing this without any kind of respect towards each other. If you are educated enough to be able to rule a certain space, and are well raised in the modesty of Islam, how can this manner be such pleasure to you?? Going back to the basics of election, we as the public are supposed to vote for a person in a party which has the credibility, passion, sense, strategy, and a people's heart to organize a certain area. But with such actions, are we now supposed to choose between the one who produce the best mockery, best bitchy words, best sense of hatred to rule?? Are we?? Campaigns are fine, but make it safe and respectful towards each party lah, the one which have the best strategy will win. Not the best verbal violation. We have no right to condemn any other person, let alone within our same religion. Haven't you understand what Islam is trying to tell you? I find it hard to even open my eyes to such people who would jeopardize their believes in the campaigns. It is as if they make Islam as a stone, and who throws the stone the furthest, deserves the publics votes (Please do not argue with me on this, as it is just as how I portray what is currently happening here in front of my eyes). Ya Allah.... What is Islam to you, may I wonder? Modesty, serenity, peace, loving, passion, respect? Or hatred, condemnation, lies, betrayal, confusion? Think.

Owh yeah, not to forget, you know, during campaigns, banners, flags etc are everywhere... Its fine, really, until they have the potential to harm you, then they are not OK OK anymore. Really. These parties are so engrossed in making a statement of "Hey, I actually have money to make lots of banners, so vote for me!" or "This is our territory. Get off!!". Hey, come on laa.. You may place your banners or flags where ever you want, but sometimes think of other's safety, please. Wanna know why?? Hurm...

I almost had a few accidents due to those super big banners. This is the real truth. After counting, 4 times near-accidents have happened. Aiyooo!!! Tie those flags properly laa!! I dont wanna list down how, but really. Think. There was this incident where the police had to bring down some of the small banners due to the maybe-banner-malfunction that could harm the road users, but some of the emo-driven party followers ignited a chaos/riot at that moment. How shallow they are... Think. What would you say if you are the one "yang terkena" with these malfunction flags? If it brings danger to others, why not place it some other else? Come on laa...

I know I have never voted before. Eventhough I am legally able to vote this season, but I cant do so, with lots of pressure of assignments, tests, thesis writing and financial roaming on. I just cant find the time to travel to my hometown and vote. I hope I could next season.

So people, think of the one that you know who can rule the nation with dignity, provides harmony among each citizens, and with peaceful mind within each age. Remember, we are a multi-racial country, so our job is to protect our nation from internal riot between races. Remember, Malaysia is full of culture, thus respect each race and religion with grace.

This post is just an opinion to those out there. None were meant to hurt any party in any possible way. But one thing to share is, to think out of the box.